Photo credit: Victor Garcia
Chronic stress is inflammatory. It doesn’t matter whether it’s physical, chemical, or emotional. The reactions triggered in your child’s body are the same.
Physical stress includes restricted diets, over-exercise, physical trauma, and health problems you may be experiencing.
Chemical stress includes prescription medications, environmental pollutants, pesticides, and processed foods.
Emotional stress includes personal, financial, and work-related concerns.
Stress is a complex phenomenon, and everyone has their tolerance for it. Like the abovementioned examples, various factors can trigger your child’s stress response. When they are exposed to ongoing stress it becomes chronic.
Your child’s body responds to stress by initiating a series of reactions that affect behavior, nervous system function, and the secretion of hormones and causes other physical and chemical changes.
Because your child’s body doesn’t discriminate between different kinds of stress, even chronic psychological stress is associated with the body losing its ability to regulate inflammatory responses.
Stress also burns through nutrients and steals them from the body's other needs, meaning chronic stress can lead to nutrient insufficiency and deficiency over time (it’s like robbing Peter to pay Paul).
Nutrients your child’s body needs to respond to stress include complex carbohydrates, protein, omega-3 fatty acids, vitamin C, vitamin E, B vitamins, magnesium, selenium, zinc, calcium, iron, and antioxidant nutrients. These nutrients play MANY roles in your child’s body in addition to helping them cope with stress, so make sure to include foods rich in these nutrients in their diet.
Stress also adversely affects the gut, leading to leaky gut and imbalanced gut flora. Hence, addressing gut health is crucial too.
You can help your child manage stress by:
Not over-scheduling activities. Kids nowadays don’t get much downtime between school, homework, and extracurricular activities. That downtime is important!
Making time for play and incorporating physical activity along with it. Think of going for a family walk after dinner, biking, hiking, playing catch, etc.
Emphasizing the importance of sleep, and make sure your child isn’t so over-scheduled that it cuts into getting enough rest.
Teaching your child to listen to their body and how to differentiate between normal or expected stress, like taking an exam, versus waking up regularly with stomach aches or headaches, which are signs there’s more going on.
Managing your stress. Remember, your child can feel yours.
Keeping things calm and organized in the morning can help everyone start the day on the right foot. Keep the focus on getting up, getting ready, getting nourished (super important), and getting out the door to where you need to be. Give enough time between waking and leaving so that no one feels rushed or anxious (tough one, but possible with some practice).
Helping your child understand that mistakes happen to everyone and it is ok not to be perfect. No one is perfect, no one knows everything, and no one does everything right.
Teach your child to be mindful and use meditation, breathing, and other relaxation techniques. Create a practice as a family.
Children may not have work, financial, or relationship concerns like adults, but they can feel your stress. Because your stress does affect your child, there are techniques to relax your mind and body that can help, including:
Stop hyper-focusing on your health problems. Now. What we think we manifest.
Write/journal about your stressful experiences for 10-15 minutes daily. Getting them out of your head and on paper can help. Once they are on paper, read them back to yourself. Some may not even seem realistic once you read it back. For those that are, list ways you may better cope with each of them. Develop your solutions.
Keep a daily list of 3 or more things that happened each day that made it a good day. Some days this may be easy. On other days it may be simply that you got out of bed or did your laundry. Always look for the positives.
Express your feelings. It’s ok to talk, cry, laugh, or express anger. Talk to friends, family, or a professional about your feelings.
Do what you enjoy. Set aside some time each day to do something just for you. Your favorite hobby, exercise, volunteer work, time with animals, time in nature, arts and crafts. This is not selfish. This is feeding your soul the fuel you need to show up for those who need you.
Be present. Living in the past causes depression, and living in the future leads to anxiety. Mindfulness and meditation focus your attention on the present. Anything that allows you to be present can help.
Whether you meditate cross-legged and chant “om” or can get into the zone during a cardio session at the gym, find your method for being present and do it regularly (most days, if not every day).
Be mindful. Use your senses and observe your body sensations, the sky, the grass, and the trees. Notice the colors around you, the sounds you hear, how your clothes feel on your skin, the smells around you, what your food tastes like in your mouth, and the feeling of your breath moving in and out of your body.
Relax your body with exercise.
Try breathing techniques, massage, tai chi, or yoga.
Find a favorite online mentor. Look to Facebook or YouTube for motivational people and videos, find someone you connect with, and subscribe to their feed. A daily dose of positive, professional motivation benefits a body and mind.
Put your phone away more often, and keep it on vibrate/turn the sound off. Being tied at the hip to our mobile devices creates a state of hypervigilance, which can lead to anxiety and stress.
Play frequency meditation music in the background during the day, while sleeping, or anytime you need to relax and take the edge off. Do an Internet search for “frequency meditation music” to learn more! This one works for adults, and children.
Other resources for managing stress overdrive:
Solving the Autoimmune Puzzle, Dr. Keesha Ewers
Stress Less, Accomplish More, Emily Fletcher
90 Seconds to a Life You Love: How to Master Your Difficult Feelings to Cultivate Lasting Confidence, Resilience, and Authenticity, Joan I. Rosenberg PhD
Tapping (aka Emotional Freedom Technique) for Eczema, Psoriasis, and Other Rashes, The Healthy Skin Show
Unbroken: The Trauma Response Is Never Wrong: And Other Things You Need to Know to Take Back Your Life, MaryCatherine McDonald
Resources
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2012/04/120402162546.htm
https://academic.oup.com/ajcn/article-abstract/61/3/631S/4652003?redirectedFrom=fulltext
https://psychcentral.com/lib/7-tips-for-helping-your-child-manage-stress/
